ACIM Conversation Inspiration & Musings

[laughingRain]

The Following is a conversation between me and another ACIM student/teacher who recently participated in a demonstration of healing upon a third party. I am LR.

M: Hey you know. Having been *one, I'd have to say they're not a 'cut above'. It's just the conversation that they're currently in with themselves. And it's good. It's their path.
*(ACIM groupie)
I've been living in isolation from my old ACIM mates for 7 years, and just working and 'being' with ordinary people. I fucking adore them. I've never tried to teach anything, but the message is always there, and virtually always gets translated. it's just love and acceptance. I was forced to go back out and address the world that I denied as my own, and I'm grateful for that. I would never have 'left the nest' if it hadn't been literally demolished from beneath me. That's actually how it happened.
I was wrong to think that I'm different, or that they were.
**No details really. I just blew up Ricks pic on my computer screen and joined him. Not hard to do. His face tells his story. I could relate to him. I fell in love. I filled up with energy, and it sprayed out my crown. Then I asked if that was it, and felt that it was.
**M is referring to my desire for details of when he said his head exploded with a healing exercise we both undertook for Ric.

LR: yes, I find faces do tell a story hard to ignore. I think blowing up Ric's photo is a useful and unique technique. I may use it myself. Wish people felt more safer to put up the ol' mug, so often find they don't want to be known intimately. people feel they have to hide sometimes. I love looking at faces, but I can tell when it's not really their own face. Spirit tells me. Words tell me too, when someone tells a lie, whether it's an intentional lie or not.
M: Then I asked God to fill him up and protect him from his fears. That's it.
LR: Well, I feel it was your work and one other healer that did the most benefit although all thoughts of healing, I feel are productive. When I was there, in my mind, I placed a cape over Ric, like a pink color, for his comfort and protection, but I saw two others doing the most work on him and they were male.
M: No big deal.
LR: yes, I know, seems quite natural for you. It's something out of the ordinary happening, so don't downplay what you just did. By someone else's standards, a miracle happened. In the future, this sort of thing will be understood as natural and because it will be more commonplace. Spirit wants me to blog on it as I'm consumed with the wonder of healing the illusory separation ACIM talks about. I'm gung-ho on the stuff, and I'm very interested in your description whereby you said you would never have left "the nest" if it hadn't literally been demolished under you. Sounds like spirit threw you in the water and told you to sink or swim.
M: This might sound a bit weird, but it's interesting.
Sickness and healing are the same idea. We believe that sickness is a finite, because we believe that bodies are finite, and that healing is not. "It's a miracle!". But because they are the same idea, we fear them both.
LR: proceeds to butt in: wonderful way of putting it. you express nonduality of the Course to say sickness and healing are the same idea. Scuse me as I pick myself up off the floor, lol, the screws fell out from sitting here too long. I'm looking forward to dying so I can get off the internet.

Yes, I can see this clearly, that sickness and healing are the same idea, if we believe the body is mortal, and who doesn't, then it has a finite sense to it. therefore healing is wholeness, and complete, and we relate healing suddenly, as "a miracle." To say we fear both sickness and being healed, I realized we do, but I had never thought of it that way much, except in the sense to "fear not evil." to say resist not what is appearing as evil. I do not believe in evil, it's just a word, as I do not believe in devils or demons, that sort of thing. I've entered nondual state, but looking back, I can see I was born with a nondual outlook to start with, not that I'm special from anyone else. I just remember being born and thinking "oh shit. here I go again!" They're going to be telling me a lot of lies and I'm going to believe them and then I'm going to forgive them and myself for believing the lies. there will be points where I'll want to commit suicide, and chicken out, but I won't succeed in that. there will be a few places I'll wonder if it's worth the trek and I'll just want to go home. everytime I call for help, I'll get it though, and no matter how much I miss home and yearn to return, I'll get through this life like I did all the others and gradually see the worthwhile side of it all, as like a return to Love.


M: Real healing is undoing fear. It doesn't come from us, because we're literally the resistance to it.
LR: I'd go a little further with this concept, to say the ego itself, as a resistance factor to truth, to Love, is a fear bundle, which is trying to survive here, in a body, while others are also trying to survive, and may see each other as enemies, adversaries to their own purposes of being, what? top dog? thinking of how the world is into competition factors right now.
I dislike football games. Probably due to the way I see injuries to the body occur in sports, as like a badge of honor among men. I see myself as a nurse type who wishes she didn't have to attend to the wounds which occur in battles, but like somebody has to clean up. I'm thinking polarity energies here. and how natural it seems for men to injure them selves or create a war and then boast of the ability to create and wage a war. Doesn't make any sense to me. Perhaps that's what ACIM means when it says we are all insane? Or at least the ego is. BTW, I am no longer the nurse type, as ACIM taught me, really, I need do nothing. Salvation has already occurred and been accomplished for mankind. If I nurse, it's just to fill in my remaining days left here.


M: I can't do anything other than agree that healing isn't fearful. I confront my own fear over it, and agree that something else is already there to replace it. That steps down the energy to the degree that it can be used to repair anomalies in the body. It's like resistors in a circuit board, and then you have transformers that can alter the amperage of the source energy. It's all just energy, and that's why it's possible. Anyone can be a 'transformer', it's just a question of who's willing.
LR: Yes, who's willing? that is the question, or maybe who's ready to be willing?
And what does willingness imply? Perhaps it's a surrender to God's will in a sense. And what is God's will? If I think about God's will, I go once more to the pages of ACIM, God's will is to heal the separation, and it is already healed, if we but dream we are stuck in a movie of time.
The transformer, I relate to the word transmutation of energy, a purifier of negative, or fear energy into positive, into a movement from a stationary place, into a spinning place. Physical is slowed down energy appearing as solid, to say, negative/positive in interaction is what this planet is all about. We exist in duality, but with a nondualistic point of reference, which is a spacious type of mindset. I'm picking up there's a fourth party is going to benefit from reading this blog, now, although I want you to know, I write for myself; I give myself insight this way, I cannot preach anymore DP says!

M: It comes from God. It's raining down on us all the time, but it's an energy that would blow out all of our circuits of resistance without help.

LR: This is what I get from that: God is Light. God is not a physical body, so God is Light, although intelligent, to say we live within God Stuff of the Universe; it rains down on us all the time, is like Love raining down. It was said in olden times (those times still here) that to stand before the Light of God, God would say, were he/she to speak, "no man sees my face and lives."
This reminds me how I must shield my eyes from too bright a light as it's painful to look directly into the sun; you can go blind if you do.
same principle that standing before the Light, all dross is burned off, to say, all non-truth, non-God, all sin/error, distortions of truth, things we believed about ourselves, that served us to participate in this world, within a body, but that no longer serve us when we enter or return to our true home, our true essence, our true being.

M: At least at this point in time. That's why we need, and eventually ask for, and receive help. "Ask, and it will be given". Or, "ask it in my name, and I'll be the transformer." That's Jesus not me.
LR: A keyword you planted on the other board, was "you need to ask." then I said, I'm asking you right now. then I started laughing, as I didn't know I would say that. Of course, all credit goes to J. The figure, the idea of J, the Christ consciousness is between us, the HS between us, God is in the relationship active. I see the principle of "ask and ye will receive" operating, with Ric being the first to ask, by asking me, then me asking you, there was a group of us though, about 4 to 6 individuals active in the healing process, yet I feel your willingness was as strong as sure as mine and another friend of mine, BMc.
The HS is also a spirit of truth, of Love, unconditional. when I was but 14, a miracle happened. I explained it as best I could in my book Road Signs.
A miracle seems a sudden change in a relationship, for the better. I remember growing quite agitated over a relationship with a man who had lust factors in his makeup. Yes, I was molested, but I won't go into that here. Just the dynamics of the overcoming process from a spiritual point of view. Jesus did not appear to come into the picture at this point. I was not raised with any religion. I remember the time period was, that I was looking for a boyfriend at age 14. a normal child. This man made sex seem dirty, and he was telling me all women were lesbians and/or whores and prostitutes.
Understandably, I would be greatly upset to find this out! haha! Oh, it's funny now, but back then, I was quite furious.
I used to talk to God, not Jesus. I was going to scream at him. I could fill the intense anger building up inside at having to live here with him a few more years, although he could not touch me anymore, I was still under his roof, and this was part of my soul's intentions to be here and get the bloke redeemed, as I later learned, I was not a victim.
God told me he was ready for redemption; had agreed to it. I was to be the transformer, the beneficiary of his redemption to honorable carriage.
I pictured then, God as a being, but J as a man, inspired of God. Later, God, Jesus, HS, Me, You, all that gets rolled up into One.
J didn't really come along for me fully until the 80's when I first found ACIM, it fell out of the sky into my hands it seemed, but I had asked for something, so I could remain among the living.
I was at a crisis point; saved again by the bell! lol

back to the miracle, I must make this brief, or I'll be here all day. While this man started up his tirade again about all of us sluts, yada yada, I was about to spout off he was ruining my self image, my hope for every young girl's quest for true love. He could be violent, I knew, he seemed very primitive, but I couldn't take it anymore.
I couldn't act like I was listening to him. Spirit came upon me and said STOP! Do not blast him. Sit down and listen to him for real. So I said, ok, show me what you want me to do and I will promise to you, I will listen for real this time.
Quietly, spirit showed me another side of his wandering life, as he sought within the woman's vagina a sanctuary never to be found. All his "whores" took him into their body willingly and still yet he sought the next vagina for a thirst that could never be satisfied with a single woman.
I actually merged spiritually into his travels, walking in his footsteps aways and I started laughing, which he'd never seen me laugh with him.

Then there was so much more that happened, but it boils down to forgiveness, what he had perpetrated against my body. We looked into each other's eyes, naked souls. Suddenly he saw himself through my eyes, but I was smiling. It was just the energy from the eyes operating. He grew fearful! Then his fear disappeared. He began to whistle. This man could whistle like nobody else!
The whistle tone was from spirit, signaling the karma was cleared, the forgiveness done. The lust was receding from his character. Somehow I knew I was the only one on Earth to do this miracle for him. If we resort to simplicity, we could say I changed his mind about what women are exactly..I brought in some equality idea to him. Yet I was not alone, we were not alone in that room.
I cannot say it was J helping me. I can see guides, invisible guides as being sent from J, and I attribute this to a guide, to say, we are each assigned like personal guides to help us deal with crisis points in our lives. While I was writing my book, my personal guide was Dead Preacher. I referred to him as DP; I think he's related to J. That's the best I can do with the conception of guardian angels. All I know is I can hear a voice talking to me whenever I am about to do something rash. Which that was a long time ago, I am not prone to rash behavior much anymore, but I can be weird sometimes, I can't take negativity, nor anger. Only if spirit asks me to take it, I will, as a transformer, but with a backup system in place, then I go ahead and let myself be used.

M: "God has willed that no man should die". God gets his way. Fear is what 'death' is. Make sense?
LR: yes of course. Fear is what death is. I must tell you sometime my experience with dying and how sublime it really was! Glad to meet you. I thoroughly enjoyed this meal with you. I perceive it as breaking bread together.
All my love to you! Ta!

[laughingRain]

A=third party
LR=my ego name
M: = a new open minded pal whom I love talking with about ACIM

M: Actually, I think it's between A and I.

LR: I think I know what you're saying; in relation to your head exploding, and you asked HS "is that it?"
since he was the recipient of your/our deed, I think in your heart of hearts, you now have a bonding with him, which goes beyond logic, and is orchestrated by HS.
so I'll get out of your way dear!
A has acted as my protector/cheerleader within spirit realm, but really his love for me is the actual link that caused my spirit to fly. he has allowed me to correct him on occasion, as well, his guide, Carlyle, confirms my intuitions, whenever I call upon A and confer with him, on something that I may be interpreting falsely. His guide, Carlyle is part of the functioning Holy Spirit concept.
Love is always the factor in any relationship. I think you contacted his essence with your spirit.
I hope you two will become good friends for a life time. either that, or you two will learn something from each other of great value.

I find the best friends to make, are the ones who are appearing quite ordinary. they are not ordinary though, once u get to know them spiritually.

M: It's nothing 'serious', but confronting for me.
LR: This may come off as a reading, I'm still not recognizing where LR goes to, my ego, when I write or when I sing, and hit just the right note, that I did not know was in me. I'm a bit of a channeler myself, like you said your partner was. you've attracted me, and I'm glad to be here. I suspected it was not serious, whatever your issue is. the confronting word denotes you are struggling with something. u r embarking to the next level of awareness on your soul chart.
you're in a very good place by facing it. spirit says a struggle is what we grow through. we use the struggle to enhance the truth of who and what we are. we get stronger through the struggle. we need others to do this, communication is the crux of our respective healings which leads to true perception. u r not afraid. that is a good sign.
you've opened up your mind. u r building a new cohesion. it's normal.

M: I'm just interested in what sort of effects we can get when we generalize healing.

LR: well, as u probably know ACIM talks about healing the separation is what we are all about. that's pretty general, right? from talking with other Course people, we are defining the generalities, in the midst of that. the only real generalization we can perhaps approach, from my pov, is to heal the emotional body of mankind, which feels separate from God. we call this the ego which denies god is here and now, we experience heart aches frequently while returning to the essence of what we are, Love.

all illness, discomfort, negativity remarks points to a feeling of being separate from god, to say indulging in the feeling of being separate from our brothers, as well as from god. all religions are limited concepts expressing. Partial truths, partial misconceptions.
thus we have specific healing methods, like doctors will specialize;
theres a foot doctor, a heart doctor, a dentist, ear doctor, so on and so forth; it's all about healing though. When we join in prayer, is the same idea, on another level, when we join with a doctor to produce a sign of healing on the body. Healing occurs then, by the act of joining with another.

the spiritualist "doctor" is the generalizer person. and love is the keynote for the action. but it's unconditional, generalized type of blanket healing. your on the right track, spirit says. and u know this stuff. you know, the salvation is already accomplished in time. We dream here.

M: Spirit always knows what needs to be done. I'm interested if 'receiving' is the same experience as giving.
LR: u already know that giving and receiving are the same thing. you told me this yourself. you are the one gave me that info! lol! now you are asking me if it's true. yes it's true. the more u give, (the pure intention of that) then you will see it return to you unimpeded by our various belief systems. the essence returns, of your purest intentions.
again, it was your service to A. you served him. what you gave him comes back to you, perhaps not thru him, but thru another individual, perhaps unknown to you presently. what goes around comes around.
let me jog your memory what you said; you said healing and sickness were the same thing, and that we were afraid of both healing and sickness. this is true. so the main project as I see it, is to move thru fear, the illusion, in whatever form we may encounter fear, as fear and love cannot reside in the same space at the same time. Either fear is real, or Love is real, but both cannot be real at the same time. this is how we create our personal reality.
we may always be afraid of something.
however we begin to see fear as a lie. as an illusion. and ACIM teaches us this is true.
therefore recognizing a fear is the first step to moving beyond it, to the essence of our being..love.
On the other side of life, there is no fear, except in the lower astral valleys, where the life reviews are going on, they will create those circumstances of guilt. which is also fear. they will move too, from this form of self punishment, they will self correct, but often enough, guides, one stop above their thinking, will awaken them to the truth, so that they can do their own self correction, from that point onward.

M: I think a forum dedicated to healing requests and healing activity is a good idea. But this one is personal and has a specific purpose

LR: I think it's a good idea too, because I hear a lot of talk, not just on ACIM boards, but everywhere. I see little action taking place, in regards to the message of healing the separation between god and man.
again, it's an illusion, that the separation took place. the body is the illusion we are separate from god, and a dam good illusion! but only in this time frame. we are moving on. the body will become useful to spirit, as a sort of vacation resort idea. in the future.
I hear you saying this one is personal, with a specific purpose.
I see you have something to protect, or you cannot logically put words around your particular struggle. But you will. You will learn how. You are capable, resilient, open and willing, so accept your own grace now, just as you instructed me to do this.

I know the feeling. it may be a feeling of frustration. spirit says you are doing the right thing. that you are on the precipice.

M: I'm not privy to what that is exactly, but needed to follow the suggestion to me. Hell, I might be that other person who is supposed benefit.

LR: well, I kinda said that to you before, u r the beneficiary of whatever type of healing thought you extend to another. as giving and receiving are the same thing.
for instance, the thing to concentrate on, as I see it, is how unselfish you were to extend a healing thought. Where in the world did you achieve such generosity?
Can it be, that ACIM is correct, to say, you, M, are love? For only Love can heal. With HS.

It means u took a risk of failure, and you accepted you weren't going to get anything back to yourself from participating in the healing; either that or you are beyond fear, at least in that moment when the head exploded, you were beyond fear. that is what us humans are doing here, getting beyond fear, to accept we are godlings; we can accomplish everything we desire, together.

we need, or if not need, we want to commune, communicate with each other, we don't do it alone. and with HS doing it thru us.
we are really never alone with HS like a blanket we live under. U mentioned HS rains down on us. Certainly HS does that. Ever walk in the rain? With your viewpoint, I think you would enjoy walking in the rain.

then you reveal a delimma; you say u r not privy to your personal and specific objective, in contacting A about this issue that you say is something you confront within your self. I'm being ultra careful, to use your own words to reflect yourself to yourself, as words can be misinterpreted quite easily. we need deal only with true perception then.

and so you must believe something is going on with you, more than mere curiosity, right?
maybe I can help you be more specific. as I figure we need to deal with specifics, and at the same time deal with generalities, which is how we deal with living in fear, while getting to the love part underneath fear.

each of us is a complicated human being. we are all healing from something, whether it's a physical ailment, emotional element, a past life circumstance, or from being too stubborn and set in our ways with our habitual belief systems we guard. called a closed up mind, or closed up heart, also there's another type of ailment; it is to live with a false way of perceiving another. ACIM talks about true and false perception.
We must continually ask HS, what is true, what is false, and also ACIM says perception, rather true or false, is not the same thing as knowledge, which only comes from experience.

A has done some absent healing, just as you have. speaking of unselfish motives operate within him. he did it to learn, and he did it without expectation of a reward. same thing as you. so it is good to meet another healer type. I'm all for you two getting together and swapping ideas. it's how the world grows into truth, by forming alliances of open minded sharing. we knock ideas around. it's only fun, if done in a nonjudgmental way.

you already know he is a sweet soul. I will tell you he has suffered. he remembers being a black child, a little girl, molested by the owner of a plantation, which during that time of history was quite prevalent, even where the slaves would bear children of the masters, as they were called. It was not right, the way the white race wrenched these poor people away from their family members. God was not around. I think you would agree. In this day and age, we will find, god is indeed around. You and me are one with God, but first we talk about it, then it becomes so, what we have created. A died young, and probably eager to leave such a wretched existence. it hurts him to remember, so he mentioned it to me; he knew I would understand. I saw he was telling the truth.
I feel I came into the world to especially support women, who have ever been abused, controlled, told they were in a man's world, hit physically, used for sexual pleasure, told they were dumb blonds, etc. and this was my experience early on, that I was sexually abused. My experience makes me an authority on the subject. A understands this. we each have a specific journey. spirit places in my path the abused ones; I show them I overcame it with HS. I show them they can overcome those feelings of victimhood and overcome as well. If anyone "wins" from something I wrote, by god, that makes me a winner too. Sharing is what Love is.
that is perhaps the basis of A and I coming together, to understand how sexuality can be a violation of the spirit here, or it can also be used for a beautiful joining experience, and for some it is that; but usually I find sex to be but a stepping stone to our real selves, the essence of love that ACIM tells us we are.
That is not to say sex is bad. Not at all, but it's just another school room, at this point in human evolution.

For instance: while A was experiencing pain in the body, he shared that with me, as he knows I am a healer.
Sometimes we cannot heal our own self. just ask me. I could not push those vertebrae back myself. he did that.

while he was in pain, the truth was blocked from his perception. he usually sends me affectionate little diddies daily. The day before his healing he sent the most gross sexual cartoons I had ever seen.
men doing sheep...etc....I felt very bad and I knew this was unlike him, so I knew he was in the utmost pain. part of the reason I asked for healing on the board for him was because of the pain I knew he was in because of what these derogatory cartoons suggested it was so. The healing actually began for him, when instead of getting uptight, I sent an email that the cartoons had made me feel bad, knowing A loves me and that was not his true intention to ever make me feel bad.

at once he responded, he knew why, because it makes a woman feel like the object which society has made her into, insofar as generalities go. he knows in his heart, a woman is not an object and is equal to the man, as well, we have yet to have our first woman president!
even beyond that projection, lol, blessed be the day we do away with the need for leadership positions. I am way ahead of myself!
He apologized the rudeness of the cartoons, and their inference that doing a sheep is funny. it's not funny. It's the basest activity, bringing mankind down to the level of the beast to portray it, to laugh at it, is to condone it.

Man is not the beast, he is to subdue the beast within. We are doing that in this day. Molestation is on it's way out, spirit says, so is rape.

Since we have a bond, it was ok to share my hurt with A, not only that he was molested as this child once, but that he could recognize, and he did, that while his body was in pain, he could not think correctly, and some of that old anger from another life was coming up for him to look at. This contrite condition arose in him, opening him to further healing, and forces stepped in, you and I and a few others, to produce his healing.

u probably didn't need to know all this. I'm a writer. I have plenty of words. I end up writing just for myself. because I know, no matter how good I am with words, people have selective viewing patterns. they just take part of the message. they will not read the whole article and connect the dots.

but miracles do happen, like this one did, and many other miracles have happened. I collect accounts also. then I write about them.
the right people, spirit picks out, to read them, for benefit.

I write for myself. when I write, I'm the one benefiting, like when I sing, I'm the one benefiting.

I felt I should share all this with you. because, mainly I am so grateful to you for what you did. and what you said to me, to make me brave, then I could ask for what I want, we have the right to ask, we may not get it, what we ask for, but it always happens, we get something even better, delivered up by HS, then we even imagined.

all my love to you new friend!
btw, it's not as personal as you are considering it to be. We are all going through similar things as you, although the curriculum, as the Course says, is highly individualized, the idea is to heal the gap, the separation that is appearing as real.
we are one with god but we need, in the egoic sense, linear time to accomplish the healing.


M: Make sense?
LR: to me it does, but the real question I would extend to you the same: do I make sense to you? if the answer is yes, I do, that means we have a holy relationship.
If I don't make sense, we have a special relationship on it's way to being holy, or whole.

If we make sense to each other, then we are existing in harmonic balance, a state of our inheritance, a state of love. or well being.